CHAPTER FIVE HUNDRED and SIXTY-SEVEN
“Being in love,” John said. “You may as well settle in and see where it takes you. You can always get out if you need to. But you should stop torturing yourself to try to make it happen. It’s happening.”
“Now, I have something serious to talk to you about,” John said.
“This wasn’t serious?” Nash asked.
“Oh it is,” John said with a smile. “Just a little different, I guess.”
“What?” Nash asked with more force than he intended. John raised his eyebrows and Nash laughed.
“Sandy can’t make you feel better,” John said. “Not right now. She’s too sick.”
“What do you mean?” Nash asked.
“She is your mom,” John said. “The most natural thing in the world would be for you to go to her and want her to forgive you or help you with all of this… angst. If she were well, you’d strategize what to do, talking it over, get some yummy baked goods, and eventually feel better. But she cannot do that right now. She’s too sick.”
“That’s why you haven’t been able to see her,” John said.
“Oh.” Nash looked down at his hands. “Noelle and Charlie too?”
“You need to be happy and light around her,” John said. “Nash, you must know that she is not mad at you.”
“I do?” Nash asked.
“Of course you do,” John said. “You are mad at you. She’s not mad at you. You know that.”
The silence became heavy and the car filled with pressure. Nash snorted and shook his head.
“She cannot help you with this stuff,” John repeated. “Not right now. Later, maybe, but not now.”
Nash looked at him.
“Did you tell Teddy that?” Nash asked.
“I did,” John said. “Teddy is just as upset as you are, but he’s trying to accept that he made a mistake.”
“I made a mistake,” Nash silently mouthed the words.
After a minute, he nodded.
“I made a mistake,” Nash said. “It’s certainly not the first one.”
Nash sighed. Nodding his head, he added, “I can live with that. I can do it.”
“I know you can,” John said. “And Nadia?”
“I think it’s over,” Nash said. “She doesn’t want to be with an addict.”
“Maybe you should talk to her,” John said. “Share your plan with her. Give her the opportunity to talk to combine her plans with yours. Work it through with her.”
“Trust the magic?” Nash asked.
“Use the magic,” John said. “You didn’t ask for this to come into your life. But it’s here now. So you may as well deal with it because, even if you spend a lifetime with Nadia, it will be over and done with soon enough.”
Nash gave a little grunt. They drove the rest of the way to O’Malley’s house in silence. Nash thanked John and got out of the car. He’d almost reached the door of the house when Nadia came out of the house. Nash smiled at her and held out his hand.
From the stop sign near the house, John watched Nash invite Nadia for a walk. He grinned as they started off down the street.
Denver Cereal continues tomorrow…
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