CHAPTER SEVENTY-EIGHT
(part four)
“I saw my mother yesterday,” Heather said. “She saw Sandy on the television and said she wanted to talk. I went over…”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You’ve been working to finish getting the Lipson sale ready. I didn’t want to bother you.”
“What did your mother say?”
“That gay boy is going to break your heart.” Heather looked over at him. “Mark my words, he’ll abandon you and the baby to go sex it up around town. Then where will you be?”
“Like I’ve sexed it up so far?” Blane’s rage and indignation echoed in his words.
“You’ve been sick,” Heather said.
“That’s what you think? I’ve made all this commitment to our life together because I’ve been sick?”
Heather looked away from him. Staring out on Colfax, she watched a group of homeless men leaning against the boarded front door of an abandoned restaurant. As if moving in slow motion, the men shifted in the morning cold.
“I know it’s dumb. I believe what Mom says,” Heather said into the passenger window. “Even though I know she’s bitter and angry with me, I still believe her.”
“I know.”
Heather turned back to look at him.
“Are you going to abandon me?”
“No,” he said. “I don’t abandon people. I never have. I never will.”
“What if you and Enrique get back together again?”
“What if you and the doctor start dating?”
“What doctor?”
“My doctor? Back there? You haven’t noticed?”
“Noticed what?” Heather asked.
“He’s totally hot for you,” Blane said.
“He is not,” Heather said. “Look at me? I’m a cow! I’ve never been this huge! I…”
“You’re gorgeous,” Blane said. “Listen, you have to listen to me. Just listen.”
Heather nodded.
“There’s an idea about gay men,” Blane said. “We’re all promiscuous, fuck each other anywhere, any time. And some men are like that. But some straight men are like that too. I had my fill of it when I was a kid. Since I’ve been clean, and had a choice, I have been sexual within the context of my relationships. No orgies, no bath houses, no book clubs, no sex through a wall or whatever. MY choice. Long before I met you.”
“But we don’t have sex,” Heather said. “Isn’t that hard on you?”
“No,” Blane said. “If you were a man, and we were in a relationship, that would be hard. Is it hard on you?”
Heather shook her head. He tilted his head to ask again.
“I mean, I miss it,” Heather said. “But not the one night stand sex.”
“You thought you’d be with that guy,” Blane said. “The tool.”
“The sperminator. I guess with the baby coming, I think about him,” Heather said. “I didn’t think he would be such an ass. God, this custody crap is just stupid. Now, he has to pay child support and will have to prove he’s capable of custody. Social services doesn’t care about the money he gave me already. What an idiot.”
“He’s pretty dumb,” Blane said. “The social worker told me that he keeps saying that he wants to stop the proceedings. But once they know he’s the father, he’s going to pay for the next eighteen years of his life.”
“Or think he will,” Heather said. “We’ll let him off the hook when you adopt the baby. If you still want to…”
“Adopt my baby? I’m so excited to meet him. I can hardly wait.”
Blane beamed at Heather and she smiled in return.
“I want what Jacob and Jill have, what you and Enrique had,” Heather said.
“Enrique’s with a guy named Calvin,” Blane said. He moved the car into the Colfax traffic. “I saw them together at the acupuncture clinic. The guy told the desk clerk that Enrique quit smoking for him. I checked Enrique’s file. It says they’re living together.”
“So he’s been with this guy all along?”
“Yep,” Blane said.
“Are you all right about it?”
“I’m not broken up about it, if that’s what you mean,” Blane said. “I have too many great things in my life to worry about him right now.”
“We have shitty taste in men,” Heather said.
“We have shitty taste in men.”
“I’m glad we have each other,” Heather said.
“Can you trust me? Is it possible just to trust me?”
Heather nodded.
“Do you trust me?” Heather asked.
“After the last three months? I trust you with my life,” Blane said. “I’m tired of talking about me being gay and you being straight. We have so many great things to talk about. This gets just stupid.”
“You’ll tell me if…”
“I will,” Blane said. “The second I fall in love, you’ll be the first to know. You’ll tell me?”
Heather nodded.
“And we won’t talk about it again?”
“I won’t,” Heather said.
“Good. I won’t either,” Blane said. “And we’re a family right?”
“You’re my only family now.”
“You’re my only family,” Blane said. “I don’t have to be in until noon. Let’s go get your car. What did you pick?”
“Subaru Outback,” Heather said.
“That’s not very fancy.”
“I’m not a very fancy girl.” Heather said.
Blane smiled and turned the car down Havana toward the dealership.
Denver Cereal continues tomorrow….