CHAPTER SIXTEEN
(part five)

“I promised Celia that I only tell you kids when you asked.”

Valerie swung around to look at him.

“Jake asked about six month’s after Celia died. But you….  What’s it been nine years?  You were at the lawyers today.  You walked in on us the night before you mother died.  And still, you don’t ask the question. Just ask me.”

“Fine.  Why did you betray my mother?”

“I’ve never betrayed your mother.  Never. Not one time in the lifetime of knowing her.  She was the very best thing in my life and I miss her like a hole in the very center of me.”

“How can you say that?  She gets ill and you’re off…. With that horrible woman… and….  I thought you had a vasectomy?”

“I did,” Sam said.  He smiled at the question.  Valerie was finally ready for the truth.  “It’s the only time Celia was truly angry with me.  She wanted babies so badly but there are reasons she’s the last of the Marlowes.  She was lucky to survive carrying Jake.  She was determined to have more children.  I… I didn’t want to loose her so I had it done.”

Valerie looked down at the bouquet of roses in her hand.  She remembered the fight. It was the only time she ever remembered her parents screaming at each other.  They fought for days.  She was five or maybe six years old.  Jake was a little more than a year old.

“Then how did you get your secretary pregnant?”

“I didn’t,” Sam said.

Valerie shook her head. She almost left again when she realized she what she needed to know.

“Dad, what happened?”

“Finally,” Sam said.  “Thanks for that.”

He held out his hands and she gave him the roses. They walked together to Celia’s grave.  He placed the roses in a flower holder near the bottom of her grave.  Letting about  breath, he turned to her.

“Celia was sick for a long, long time.  She fought the cancer for a decade or more. She wanted so much to live.” Sam smiled remembering.  “We kept it from you kids because…. Well… because raising you was… important to us.  When we knew that fighting wasn’t an option any more, she…”

He stopped talking for a moment.  His expression reflected his love and frustration for his Celia.

“Oh your mother…. She always thought the best of everyone.  If someone was awful, she would say that they didn’t know any better.”

They said together, “with loving support they will blossom.”  They laughed.

“Tiffanie’s boyfriend was in and out of prison.  She was just pregnant with Brianna when he violated parole and was sent back to Canyon City.  Your mother felt that if I married her, said that the baby was mine, I would save Tiffanie… and her children.”

“But why would Mom do that?”

“Why do you think?” Sam asked.

“Can’t you just answer the question?”

“Who did your mother love more than anyone in this world?”

“You.”

“More than me and more than Jake.”

“No one.  Jake was her favorite.”

“God damn it Valerie.  You know that’s not true.”

At that moment, patience left Sam Lipson.  The last 20 hours left him raw, exhausted and unwilling to play into anyone’s bullshit.

“Me.” Valerie whispered.

“Exactly.”

“But this destroyed me.  I….”

“Your mother knew things,” Sam said.

“Like Jake and Delphie.”

“More like Jake.  Long term visions, big picture stuff.  Life was a chess board to Celia.  While all our friends went into building houses, we switched to underground utility. Celia knew the Californians would come to Colorado and build cheaper than anyone else.  Everyone we knew went out of business except us.  Delphie is good at the next six months and specifics in the next day or hour.”

“Mom knew about Mike,” Valerie said.

“And your baby,” Sam said.  “She knew that I wouldn’t make it… six months without her. With her death, my death, the baby, and Mike… She didn’t think you’d survive.”

“I barely survived as it is.”

“Exactly,” Sam said.  “The only thing that would keep me going was having people depend on me.  And I do love babies.  I didn’t care about living without her but…”

Sam face shifted to a kind of quiet love. His eyes filled.

“She believed that your anger… for me… would pull you through all of the loss.” He put his hand on her shoulder.  Valerie looked up into his face.  “She was right.”

“Oh Dad.” Valerie reached up and her father hugged.

While she cried into his shoulder, he said, “It was so worth it, Val.  So completely worth it.”

“Val! Val!” Mike yelled from the car.  He ran across the grass to them.

“Jake’s dead.”

Denver Cereal continues tomorrow….